Death or glory becomes just another story

Chris from A Deliberate Life wrote a post about mental toughness and in it she said:

I was willing to never lose a pound, just to KNOW I had control over what I ate and how I moved my body, it was enough.

I am having a hard time with this. I keep projecting forward: What will I look like when I'm below 200 lbs? How long will that take? Can I get to 132 lbs? (For some reason 132 is like the magic number I've always thought I am supposed to be even though I've never been 132 lbs in my entire adult life.) And all in all it doesn't matter. That number or what I look like at a certain number shouldn't matter. It's about being healthier. It's about being able to be active and play with James. He said the other day he would be so happy if I played soccer with him in Golden Gate Park and I am going to make that happen. It's about fueling my body so it can do those things and live longer. THE NUMBER DOESN'T MATTER. Maybe if I say it enough, it will become true.